Poetry by Paige Milatz

‘Twas the night before Christmas, and that much is true,
But there were creatures stirring, so we need a re-do:

‘Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the town
Every canine was restless and would not settle down;
Border collies were whining, and beagles made haste—
Each breed with the zoomies couldn’t stay in one place.
The poodles they shivered, cocker spaniels astir,
And chihuahuas shook nervously beneath their short fur;
Even the coyote on this cold winter’s night
Let out a “yip yip!” at the moon shining bright.
The dogs were all anxious, deservedly so—
A big job loomed before them as they paced to and fro
For they knew the truth about chimneys and sleighs,
But have kept it a secret to this very day:
A big man like Santa, who slips down the flue?
How could you believe that? Impossible! Untrue!
‘Tis man’s best friend who brings Christmas each year,
Now I’ll tell you their story if you’ll lend me your ear.

He has elves in the North and wolves for his sled,
But St. Nick needs more help while you’re upstairs in bed.
He’d be stuck on the front porch with all the doors locked
And no way inside—couldn’t possibly knock!
No, he can’t wake a soul nor shimmy down pipes,
So he relies on your fur babies, all sizes and types!
For dogs are quite clever, you should know that by now,
And while you dream of Christmas they’ve figured out how
To let Santa in, through their own doggy doors—
They slide him the keys they retrieved from the drawers!
With a jingle and jangle, St. Nick turns the knob,
Wipes his boots on the mat and then sets to his job.
First he praises each dog: “Good girl! And good boy!”
Then he hands them a treat and a new, rugged toy.
The pouch on his waist? Packed with chicken and liver!
St. Nicholas is the most thoughtful gift-giver!

While he lays many presents beneath many trees,
The dogs are allowed to explore as they please;
They go out to sniff the sled parked the lawn
And visit the wolves who are hitched up ‘til dawn.
There’s six wolves in all, and they’re all fur and muscle
But they know how to temper their power to tussle!
The wheel wolves at back are Lupus and Thunder,
Then the pair in the middle are Sprinter and Hunter,
And to round out the team, tasked to guide Santa’s way
Are Lobo and Leader at the front of the sleigh!
When Santa is through laying trinkets with care,
His whistle rings out through the brisk, snowy air:
“Come in pups and rest, your job here is done,”
And the dogs settle down after having their fun.
Mr. Claus makes his exit, with the gifts left behind,
Each dog feeling grateful for treatment so kind.
“Ow-ooo!” Santa howls to his trusty wolf pack,
And the wolves bound away with a short holler back.

Now you may be wondering, What if no dog’s around?
It’s a shame you’ve forgotten about all the stray hounds!
Their work is important, sniffing keys for the locks
That are stuck under doormats or hidden in rocks.
To these furry helpers he gives the gentlest care
Since they don’t have a family; it just isn’t fair!
So he scoops them all up for a ride in his sled,
He pets them and thanks them with a kiss on the head,
And then his eyes twinkle, and with a magical nod
The strays change into puppies, so small and so soft!
He gives them a bed next to warm fireplaces
In homes needing love—a dog to lick faces.
A fresh start for the pups, no more paws in the cold—
The kindness of Santa Claus never grows old.

And at last when all dogs are snug and content
Santa sighs to himself after a long night well spent:
“Stay safe, my dear friends, and I’ll see you next year!
Thank you ever so much for helping spread Christmas cheer!”
As the wolves pull away and the dogs fall asleep,
They dream jolly dreams of their Christmas secret to keep.

Paige Milatz lives and writes in the Little Spokane River Valley. She is a graduate of Central Washington University’s Master of Arts in Professional and Creative Writing program. You can find more of her work on her Substack publication, Treat Her Right, at https://treatherright.substack.com/.