Tag: aging (Page 1 of 2)

Faded Picks and Broken Strings for Eric

10 May 2026 / Editor

Poetry by James Fleet Underwood

My gait aches, Kwan says I’m stooping,
and the nose I broke brawling with your cousin
wheezes in the winter, but more times than not
I’m staring at my toes and laughing
as if I just found the man I was looking for
standing sunburned in the grass.

You chat easy with us here, old friend,
our table cleared of plate and cloth,
smoking Drum and pushing coffee round a saucer
with your thumb, that waggish smile
tucked in several years of beard, and if I
don’t recognize the manifestation of your intent,
I know it’s love you always bring me.

We’re taking longer walks these days,
Kwan and I, going back to Strummer’s Hollow,
to that shed where you holed up with your Gibson,
where you wrote that tune of gals and gin,
a raunchy 12 bar riffed off with a grin,
and we kick up faded picks & broken strings – I
think she found that charm of yours,
the one you swore the barmaid stole in Reno.

Your spirit’s strong and flies here with October,
a stormy Michigan wet wood thing, though I
know you bang your can amongst the living,
and I wake those nights, hear a strumming,
get honey from the bed, and we walk the trails
swinging lanterns, asking wisdom from the bears.

James Fleet Underwood writes poems rooted in place, season, and daily life. His work explores quiet relationships with the natural world and the small rituals that shape human presence within it. Find him on X: @jamesfleetpoems and Substack: jamesfleetpoems.substack.com

We Sat You at the Water’s Edge

4 May 2026 / Editor

Nonfiction by Aldo Giovannitti

Bruno does his business by the bench by the parish, then he pulls. This is station two of our morning circuit. The road climbs and then levels, and you trudge along, as we crawl arm in arm, the leash in my other hand. Going back, you murmur, I would try not to escape all the time from myself. Then you disengage, and let your eyes be carried by the asphalt flowing below us.

You sit on the couch, hands on your knees, your robes hung on whatever is left of you. I notice your hump for the first time, then I look at my watch. Still one hour to the next round of pills; after that there’s lunch. She bends to lay a towel on your chest, so we won’t need to clean your shirt when you’ll wake up. She knows that in the wait you’ll let your eyelids go, bring your lips apart, and abandon your head to its weight.

Your attention span has contracted to a handful of seconds, and we need to pull words out of you quick before they are gone, before they drag with them your blurred intentions. Have I run away from here searching for what was closest to you? You made it, you said seventeen years ago standing on this very rug, holding my visa in both hands, staring at my portrait superimposed on the filigreed page.

Now you can speak only a tenth of what you used to, but each word is made of rock; the unessential has fled you. I’ve never paid as much attention to what you say as I do now—mumble, in truth—and the more I listen, the more I see you too had an entire life of your own. You too have wandered the lands, swum the seas, spun through the clouds I believed were mine alone. Your world, infinite as mine; I have finally surrendered not to comprehend it.

After dinner comes the fourth and last round. You lay the pills on the tablecloth, lining them up as you did with most things in your life. This is a ritual, and we follow its steps with devotion. You unscrew the plastic bottle, tilt it together with your chest, and pour the water onto the tablecloth, beside the glass, for the time it would have taken to fill it. We let you do that without intervening, watching the water spread on the double-folded cotton, because that is the least respect we can pay. And when you set the bottle aside you find out the glass is empty. You jerk back. Fooled again. Then we fill the glass for you.

We’ve spent the last day of this rare visit, before I fly away, at the beach house you both returned to for the past fifty-two years. A silent drive got us here. And by now an entire day has passed, and Bruno has run along the water’s edge to exhaustion. We sat you on a chair in the sand, but you didn’t like the wind and turned your gaze away from the sea.

The sun has set, and I walk past your bedroom heading to mine. I see you sleep in a fetal position, hiding into the wall, holding onto the orthopedic pillow she has bought to you both. I didn’t know you slept this way now, and that she let your bedside lamp burn through the night.

The lamp is recycled from my childhood; it diffuses a dim red light. And the light fills your heart more than it fills the room, while you dream of a decades old, Italian summer.

Aldo Giovannitti writes about shifting perception, moral ambiguity, and transformation. His work has appeared or is forthcoming in Open Journal of Arts & Letters, The Bookends Review, and Corvus Review, alongside essays in The Diplomat and South China Morning Post. He is a member of The Poetry Society and PEN America and is based in London.

Lives Intersected

1 May 2026 / Editor

Nonfiction by Gail Purdy

“Mom, it’s me!” I call out as I enter the apartment. Silence hangs in the air. “Mom?” I call out again before moving towards the bedroom and adjoining bathroom. I see the blood-stained towel first, then my 94-year-old mother lying motionless on the bathroom floor. One of the sliding glass shower doors is off its track and rests at an angle up against the shiny white tiles. Only the metal frame keeps it from falling further and landing on her. Is she dead? I hesitate for a second, which feels more like an eternity, before reaching for her wrist. Her eyes blink open at my touch.

An avalanche of emotion surges through my body, threatening to crush me. I want to scream and cry. Instead, I shove fear and anxiety into the shadows at the back of my mind.

“Do you feel any pain?” I ask.

“My back hurts . . . and my head.” She struggles to get the words out. Dried blood has formed a crust around the gash at her temple. A large purple and blue bruise is making its way down her cheek.

“What happened?” Should I try to move her or call the paramedics? I can’t decide.

This is the fourth fall in less than two months. I push the rising dread to the back of my mind, up against the fear and anxiety already exiled there. I reach for my phone and press three digits before sitting on the floor next to my mother. No words pass between us.

When the paramedics arrive, she complains of neck and back pain. Concerned about a possible fracture, they place a rigid collar around her neck, and strap her to an orange plastic stretcher, immobilizing the rest of her body. They move fast, wheeling her down the hallway and out the door to the waiting ambulance. “I’m going to the hospital too . . . I’ll be right behind you,” I shout after her. “You’ll be okay, Mom.” Are the assuring words for her or for me?

At this early hour there is plenty of space in the parking lot near the emergency entrance. Two streetlights cast a thin pattern of light across the gravel, but not enough to illuminate anything that might be hidden in the shadows. I turn off the car engine and sit motionless, except for my shaking hands, and watch the paramedics take my mother into the ER. I take a deep breath. My lungs resist the expansion, fearful the air supply will be cut off before they grasp what they need. I release several breaths before getting out of the car.

Antiseptic smells mingled with urine and fear assault me when the glass doors slide open. The familiar odours hang in the air threatening to suffocate like they always do when the doors close behind me. “Why isn’t anyone helping me?” My mother’s cries join the chorus of voices in the room.

“There are many people who need help. The doctor is very busy. You’re his next patient.” The lie falls easily from my lips. Heaviness sits in my stomach and the weight of it anchors me to the chair next to my mother.

“My neck hurts . . . and my back hurts,” she cries out. Her body is still immobilized.

A nurse moves between us and slips a little blue pill under my mother’s tongue before she turns and settles her gaze on me. Her eyes are soft with kindness as she places her hands on my shoulders. “Your mother has lived her life . . . you need to live yours.” Her touch is gentle, but her words split my heart open with an unexpected force. The weight of being a caregiver is slowly crushing me. I want to leave but I can’t move.

“Where’s the doctor? Why don’t they help me?” Mom’s voice now shrill.

My voice breaks through her mounting fear. “The doctor is busy. An ambulance just brought a man into the hospital. He’s been shot, and he might die if the doctor doesn’t help him first.”

I continue to evolve the fictional tale until I see the blue pill take effect. Mom’s eyes close, and I see her face soften. My eyes close too, releasing the tears I can no longer hold back.

Gail Purdy lives life on the west coast of British Columbia. Her writing has appeared in Four Tulips, rhizomag, Witcraft, Missing Pieces (a grief anthology from Quillkeepers Press), Last Syllable, The Bluebird Word, and the 2021 Amy Award Anthology. Long walks in the forest accompanied by her inner child nurture her creative soul.

Photo by Richard Pasquarella on Unsplash

Back Then

1 January 2026 / Editor

Poetry by John Attanas

Back then
after January’s first wallop
I would venture out,
camera clutched
like a family heirloom,
to capture the drifts,
the overwhelmed shrubs,
the laden branches,
bending under the weight
of the watery white powder.
Back then
the cold didn’t
press on my heart,
tear at my cheeks.
I was one
with the silence
of the snow filled streets
certain that morning was
more beautiful than any
that had come before.

Now
I sit on a Florida patio
watching the waves
lap the sand
pull on a sweater
it’s barely 65.
Now
I walk the beach
one mile in each direction
imagine swimming to Portugal
then clean my toes
of sand and muck
before I head back
for lunch,
a nap,
and a half-hearted attempt
to put pen to paper
before the evening news.

John Attanas recently graduated from the MFA program at the City College of New York. He is 63 years old. His poetry has been published in Promethean, Mistake House, The Marbled Sigh, Steam Ticket, The RavensPerch, and Abandoned Mine.

Overheard, an offering

3 October 2025 / Editor

Poetry by Michelle Hasty

The line of us waits silently for the audiologist
Leaf green chairs face closed white doors
We seem ordered according to age and startle
When a mechanical voice shouts at us
From someone’s purse saying that she has reached
Her destination and the owner of the phone
Stops the sound, shakes her head, and says
She’s asked her son to quit with the technology
But he tells her she must join the 21st century
I’m here, she says, giggling, I just don’t know
What to do here. The line of us giggles with her.
Silence broken, a pair to my left discusses ailments.
It’s always something, one says.
I can’t hear the specifics—this is why I’m here–
But I catch a phrase from the other: I can’t really complain,
She says. The phrase catches me up short: I can complain.
I don’t want pink plastic devices attached to my ears
When I’m barely fifty. The possibility of a piercing
Shriek emanating, of my body beeping, I’m here!
Seems like a good reason to complain. Wasn’t I just
In middle school forever scrambling on the grass
Searching for lost contact lenses, or praying in ballet class
That the sound of music would cover my knees cracking?
A white door opens and a wobbly woman emerges,
Sinks into an empty chair at the end of our line.
Dizzy, she mutters. Getting crackers, the technician calls
Bustling past us, using her badge to exit the corridor.
The woman who can’t complain digs something
Out of her purse, holds a cupped hand to
The one who is dizzy, and asks, would you like a peppermint?
I am grateful to have heard this offering.

Michelle Hasty is a professor of education living in Nashville, Tennessee. Her academic writing has been published in literacy journals, such as Voices from the Middle and The Reading Teacher, and her short story, “Prone to Wander,” was published in the Dillydoun Daily Review. She is new to poetry writing.

Julia

28 June 2025 / Editor

Nonfiction by Pama Lee Bennett

I’m standing beside a gurney in the emergency room, a gurney on which my great-aunt, age 104, is lying. Some preliminary tests have been done. A doctor we haven’t seen before enters and stands opposite me across the gurney. He doesn’t address her but begins talking over her to me.

“She appears to have a kidney condition, but I’m not sure we can do much to help her at her age.”

I look down at her, and back to him.

“Doctor, I’d like you to do for her whatever you would do for me, or yourself, or your own mother.”

“Well, your aunt is very old. She is probably at the end of her life.”

I think to myself, wait for it, wait for it.

My aunt looks up at him sweetly and says, “Doctor, I would like to live. But if I die, it’s all right.”

The look on his face: priceless.

He mumbles that certain procedures might injure her delicate body, but he can order some medication. I say, “Ok, I can understand that, but let’s do what we can.”

He leaves the room.

He can’t know that she walked on her own and lived on her own until 100. That she loves to play Skip-Bo with family members every week. That she reads voraciously and still keeps in touch with former students from her days as a one-room school teacher. That she hushes me in conversation if Tiger Woods comes on the golf channel and she wants to watch him play.

I can’t know that nine months from now, she will die suddenly and quietly of natural causes one afternoon, just short of 105.

I can’t know that. But neither can the doctor.

Pama Lee Bennett is a retired speech-language pathologist living in Sioux City, IA. She has taught English at summer language camps in Poland and at a school there in 2019. Her work has appeared in Tipton Poetry Journal, Evening Street Review, The Bluebird Word, The Penwood Review, and others.

pink rose in vase centerpiece on brown wooden table — Photo by Lisa Fotios on Pexels.com

Book and a Bagel

6 March 2025 / Editor

Fiction by Alice Baburek

The old woman shuffled into the cozy and popular place. The line was longer than usual, yet she had no qualms with waiting. She held her prize possession against her sagging chest.

After several minutes, her legs began to ache. She tried desperately to rid her mind of the continuous pain. Finally, it was her turn.

“Good morning, Joan. I’ll have my usual, dear.” Her faded blue eyes still twinkled. A smile filled with yellow, crooked teeth. Her thinned gray hair tousled from the cold, blustering wind. But nothing could deter Elsie Mills from her rooted routine each morning. Nothing.

“Morning, Elsie. How are you feeling today?” Joan busily toasted the bagel twice and smothered it with melted butter. Just the way Elsie liked it.

“Every day is a good day when you’re alive!” Joan chuckled as Elsie waddled along to the register. “Coffee, please.” The tall young man handed her a medium-sized cup.

The second-hand coat hung to her knobby, arthritic knees. She fished inside the pocket. After several tries, Elsie yanked out a five-dollar bill. With a shaky hand, she gave it to the cashier. The other hand held the precious commodity.

Without saying a word, he took the money and gave Elsie the change. She abruptly shoved it back into her pocket. Change came in handy when taking the long bus ride home.

Minutes later, Elsie sat alone in the crowded cafe. The small round wooden table fit her nicely. She sipped at her steaming brew—roasted hazelnut, her favorite. With an everything bagel to her right and a hot cup of coffee to her left, she dared to open her escape from reality.

Today was an adventure like never before. Traveling the countryside on a wing and a prayer. Enjoying heaven’s delight as nature greets the foolhardy, leaving the chaotic world behind.

A warm summer breeze. The sun glistens off the white-capped waves as they roll onto the bronze sandy beach. Life at its purest moment.

Elsie let out a huge sigh. The Morning Café had emptied. She had been reading for hours. What was left of her coffee had become cold to the touch. The tasty bagel was long consumed in all its delicacy; how she yearned for younger days. When her life was no longer ruled by sickness and pain. When her mind was sharp and free from muddiness.

For Elsie, the enlightening sense of freedom came in books where imagination brought peace and serenity without physical restrictions and inabilities.

The frail woman leaned back and closed her grainy eyes. Suddenly, exhaustion reclaimed her body as it went limp. The book slipped closed. Her right hand fell by her side. Elsie drifted away into an endless sleep.

The paramedic checked her pulse once more. She looked up at her fellow EMT. Slowly, she shook her head. The two of them loaded the deceased woman onto the gurney. It was then they both noticed something quite strange. Elsie Mills was smiling.

Alice Baburek is an avid reader, determined writer and animal lover. Retired, she challenges herself to become an unforgettable emerging voice.

Spaces

10 February 2025 / Editor

Fiction by Christine Breede

My son has outgrown me. He leans down for a fleeting hug, then turns away; he’s already on his way out again. I stand with both hands on my hips, eyes following him, seeing a boy in a man’s body. Where are you going?

Maybe this is a story about destinations.

We are not talking, I say. Why can’t we sit and talk? What’s going on? I ask. My son is making plans with a friend on the phone, and I am asking him to speak to me—now.

Maybe this is a story about making plans.

I buy new books, schedule yoga classes and getaways. I see my friends, spend quality time with my partner, eat out and eat in, plant herbs, work more than I should. I’m energized in the morning and drained by nightfall when I see his room empty.

Maybe this story is about newness.

I am listening to my son’s voice change. I am watching him cook pasta al dente and call the hairdresser himself. He talks to my mother whenever we visit, making her laugh—until he stands at her grave, now speaking to her in a whisper. We miss her and her voice on the phone, unmistakable above all others. I feel the void and the void growing.

Maybe voices are the story.

I remind my son of when we took a gondola in Venice, boy and mom, and after a minute of rocking in the dark canal, before we even left the pier, he closed his eyes. I remember this, he says. What can you remember? I say. You didn’t see a thing. I know, he says, that’s what I remember.

Maybe remembering is the story.

Pictures from years ago pop up on my phone. My son looking at a pumpkin as if it were an oracle. His mister spy eyes under ruler-straight bangs no one understood but him. The two of us with ice cream cones and big smiles. My head leaning on his shoulder after a birthday dinner.

Maybe this story is about appreciation.

Everything about him is as it should be. I have a strong sense of his being. He has a strong sense of his being. But I don’t know where we are.

Maybe fear is the story.

I am watching my son grow big and myself grow old. It’s about aging with grace, someone says. Who the hell ages gracefully? It’s about aging with mischief, with bold beliefs, with a heart in the right place, I tell myself on a good day.

Maybe courage is the story.

His eyes are telling me his heart is in the right place. His stillness is telling me I need to listen. I watch him get ready to go out. I resist an impulse to go over to him, resist again. I feel the space between us and the space within me.

Maybe this story is about listening to space.

Christine Breede writes long, short, and very short fiction. Her work has been recognized by several leading contests. She was nominated for the Pushcart Prize 2020 and has won the 2022 Bumble Bee Flash Fiction Contest. Working and collaborating with fellow writers is one of the things she enjoys most.

Muscle Memory

1 May 2024 / Editor

Poetry by Anne Bower

She’d told us the genetics,
smiled into the words
as if Alzheimer’s was just
some trip to the beach.

Now she can’t drive,
husband brings her to class,
where she’s
blank-faced at first,
repeats name of disease
that’s taking her mind.
Frowns as we start,
yet her body glides to tai chi.

A pause. She shakes her head,
not knowing what comes next.
A breath, shudder,
yet years of practice surge
her forward. She steps, turns,
gestures easy, smooth.
She’s swimming in a calm sea,
grins with delight.

Anne Bower lives in rural Vermont, teaching tai chi and training tai chi instructors. She has three chapbooks to her credit and poems published in The Raven’s Perch, Gemini Magazine, Cool Beans, Nine Cloud Journal, Plainsong, and many other journals and anthologies.

i touch this ripe tomato

1 May 2024 / Editor

Poetry by Amelia Díaz Ettinger

and marvel at how all things
soften—

his voice muted
to warm embers that avoid
scarlet overtones

and my old hands
carved to rice paper,
skin hulled away from bone

even this butcher knife
is dulled from over-care
now it cuts with tenderness

yes,
time’s own waltz,
mollifies all things

and i applaud these parenthesis
of my mouth, how
they enliven my sight

after all they are the repositories
of elapsed laughter

Amelia Díaz Ettinger is a Latinx BIPOC poet and writer. She has three books of poetry and two chapbooks published. Her poetry and short stories have appeared in many literary journals and anthologies.