Tag: writer's life

Volcano

Flash Fiction by Robby Sheils

Noel Hammond looked out his townhouse windows to the fractured sidewalk, its bricks covered in ant hills and tufts of beige grass. All of Brooklyn had been dry for a month, and the seventy-year-old grew to believe the bizarre fantasy that it wouldn’t rain until he pitched a new mystery for adaptation.

Amid the drought, Noel struggled to find his next success. He had made a living from his mystery novels, many of which went on to become bestsellers, though most of his success came from production companies buying him out. He had recently written a novella’s worth of pages on a retreat to his lake house, about a boy who fished dinner for his folks and fell in love with the girl in the cliffside mansion. It marked the fastest story he ever wrote, but it ended without a twist. And a movie without a twist seemed foolish, and so Brooklyn remained dry.

Noel recognized that blaming himself for the dry spell was a silly thought. But it was also a haunting one. He agonized over this supernatural burden until his stomach grumbled, and with great reluctance he stepped outside.

The afternoon sun hung high, and the clouds above him loomed massive and ominous. It was the hottest June in memory; every afternoon the sky threatened to break and every night it balled up and looked ugly and never did. All waiting on Noel.

Lost in a brainstorm, he meandered the quiet, upscale streets of Fort Greene. He daydreamed of Polly. Had it really been five years since she passed? Every step down their block felt undeserving. She was the one who pointed out the flower beds, who took great interest in holiday decorations and raved about the font of street numbers. Never Noel.

In the deli, four Hispanic men sat huddled, joking about something. Or nothing. The cold air from the AC snapped Noel back to Brooklyn, and rainless guilt spread across his arms in goosebumps.

He grabbed a ham sandwich and moved along. Home happened to be past an old Episcopalian church, but the heat made him lightheaded and so he paused to stare at the copper steeple, its years worn into a muted patina.

And right then and there the sky made up its mind and broke wide open. In an instant, rain fell in buckets and the road rumbled like a revving jet engine.

Noel ran as fast as his arthritic knees could take him, beelining for a skinny overhang outside a laundromat. A woman, about Noel’s age, and a boy were also marooned. Out of courtesy, they shuffled as close to the edge as the tiny cover allowed. The woman stood tall and elegant, and the boy had shins that marked a lanky and painful stretch of puberty. He held an orthodox paper-mâché diagram of a volcano, complete with a construction paper forest and a bright blue river of churned up Jell-O.

“Thank God for roofs!” he yelled over the slugs of rain, attempting to dodge awkwardness from their suddenly close quarters.

“Ah!” the woman agreed, along with other words that got swallowed in the storm.

“Pardon?” yelled Noel. The rain beat the roof at an alarming speed.

“My grandson! He wants to become a chemist!”

“Aha!”

The woman edged closer to Noel. He could see that when she smiled, like she was now, two dimples peeked through her wrinkles. “What about you?” she asked. Her voice sounded clear and steady.

“Sorry?”

“What did you want to be? When you grew up?”

She stared at him warmly, like an old friend or lover, and the inside of Noel’s chest fluttered in a way it had not in years. He glanced at his shoes and down the road. “An author.”

“Ah, that’s a good one,” she said, looking towards her grandson. “And what did you become?”

Noel rubbed at his knuckles. “An author.”

She laughed with her whole body, beautiful and earnest, and rounded it off with a clap that rang above the rain.

“Have you written anything good?”

“I think so.”

“Are you writing something now?” she asked, turning back to Noel.

Despite years of answering this very question—his agent’s favorite one—it still caught him off guard. Her tone sounded neither critical nor demanding, but honestly curious. It defied business. “Trying to,” he said.

“How much have you got done?”

“The whole thing.”

There was that laugh again.

“The whole thing?” she asked.

“Yes, but it needs a twist.”

The rain toned down to a pitter. The grandson used his pointer finger to do touch-ups on his Jell-O river.

“That’s silly,” she said, dimples showing again.

“No one would buy it,” he said.

“I would.”

The rain had nearly died, and the wet road began to glint. Noel looked at her, straight in her unblinking hazel eyes, and believed her.

“Would you like to get a coffee sometime?” he asked, the words out of his mouth before he could digest them himself.

“Yes,” she said, “as a friend. Could we be friends?”

Noel surprised himself with a smile. Like a boy crushing on a schoolteacher, he recognized the flutters in his stomach as butterflies of respect, not romance. Having someone to talk to—about whatever, about nothing—he missed dearly.

The two brainstormed a café where they could meet, and then said their goodbyes. Noel crossed the road, smelling the sweet metallic rain, and wondered if others would read his story. It was the fastest one he ever wrote for God’s sake, and it may as well be finished.


Robby Sheils is an emerging writer from Portland, Maine, who primarily writes slice-of-life fiction. He spent two years as an editor for The Telling Room, and in 2022 released a self-published novel, Shelley Avenue. He was most recently published in Rock Salt Journal. He now lives in Brooklyn, New York.

Muse

Nonfiction by Linda Briskin

Muse is elusive. She can be Calliope, the Greek goddess of eloquence. Or Melpomene, the muse of tragedy, or Clio, the goddess of memory. Sometimes she is Urania singing with the stars or Thalia chanting to the ferns as they uncurl in the spring.

The last time I saw Muse, I was trying to meditate while sitting on a rock in densely tangled brush in a Toronto ravine. Rippling water in the creek, filtered summer sun patterning the ground, and spirited bird conversations all distracted. Muse settled beside me, her breath sweet and warm, her eyes closed, our shoulders suddenly touching. She was humming. I joined her and together we offered a melody to the trees.

Perhaps I first met Muse in the library in a small white church perched on a hill, not far from my school in Montréal. I was eight. She was dressed as a librarian—brown tweed skirt, sensible shoes, glasses on a string. She never scolded me for surrounding myself with teetering piles of books in the far back corner. We didn’t really talk, but she saw me, her gaze intent as if she knew and approved of my obsession with words, my passion for stories, my delight in smoothing the cover of a new book. She always saved one for me: an invitation to a place where I could
disappear and perhaps find myself. A gift.

Decades passed and Muse has always been a presence, if inconstant and capricious. Sometimes I catch a trace of her in a discarded twist of striped ribbon, or a child sitting absolutely still on the stairs of a shabby house with a bright blue door. Perhaps a hint of her in an envelope decorated with elaborate calligraphy and abandoned on a park bench. Or in the reflections of clouds and trees in pools of water after a storm.

I’m certain I glimpsed her one summer while kayaking on Stony Lake. Although difficult to discern through the sun’s brightness, Muse seemed to float casually in the air, enveloped in almost translucent gossamer. Tantalizing, just at the edge of my awareness. Then she was in the water: a mermaid, her scales sleek, her locks glistening, her arms reaching out. Remember, her look instructed.

I do remember a dullish day in the interstice between fall and winter on a rare trip on the Toronto subway. I caught her reflection in a window. Her red felt cap had a peacock feather tucked in the brim, swaying with the clickety-clack of the wheels. Inspired, I wrote:

Lucy unearths the red felt cap carefully wrapped in tissue from a hatbox buried in the back of her great-aunt Mary’s closet. Mary was a milliner in her youth and made hats in her small store on St. Denis. Why did she keep this one, Lucy wondered.


No glimpse of Muse, not for many months now, not since the encounter in the ravine. But today at a gathering of writers, where I sit deep in a corner, she is suddenly perched on a stool next to me, vibrating with an energy both compelling and irritating. She is twirling her long braid—an annoying habit. She turns to me with an eager smile. “What’s your favourite word?” she asks.

“About you?” I reply, my voice curt, my stare hostile. “Unpredictable, fleeting, evanescent, temperamental, unstable, erratic, fanciful, transient, provocative, obstinate, uncompromising. You’re a shadow in a dark room, a slight movement in the wind, a musical note at the edge of what’s audible.”

Are you elusive because I bore you? The thought flits through my mind. I want you to be an enduring whisper in my ear, at my service. Constancy, loyalty—all that the world is not. I’m suddenly wild with urgency and desire. Then I start to laugh, hiccupping, almost sobbing. Who doesn’t yearn for such devotion? To be seen and known?

Muse tilts her head toward me, her light blue eyes intent. “Expectations and demands turn me inside out,” she says. “ I sink into silence and splinter into pieces. I’m ephemeral. I delight in winding myself in and around the green shoots of spring. I relish eavesdropping on the conversation at the next table in a café and lying down on a page of text—each letter a fascination. Keep me close, but let me twirl and flutter, and dance to the words I hear. I do whisper in your ear. Listen for it.”

Then we are humming, not quite in tune but together.


Linda Briskin is a writer and fine art photographer. Her CNF embraces hybrid forms, makes quirky connections and highlights social justice themes—quietly. As a photographer, she is intrigued by the permeability between the remembered and the imagined, and the ambiguities in what we choose to see. @linda.briskin and https://www.lindabriskinphotography.com/.

Walk a Block

Poetry by Brian Christopher Giddens

The brace of wind
Belies the broad blue sky
And puffs of clouds above me.

I walk, briskly,
To clear my head.

But let’s be honest.

My head is as empty
As a vacant room,
Dull, devoid of detail.

I need an image.
An image that gives birth
To a first word, then a series of words,
Forming sentences, creating a theme,
A theme that leads to a poem.

Or perhaps a story.
An idea that sparks imagination,
A bursting star in a black sky,
Creating a world, a place,
Out of nothing.

A world of words that
Make my fingers fly ‘cross the keyboard
Stopping at times, mid-flight,
To wipe my eyes,
Or laugh out loud.

Lost, in a new land.


Brian Christopher Giddens writes fiction and poetry from his dining room table in Seattle. Brian’s writing has been featured or is pending in Raven’s Perch, Litro Magazine, Silver Rose, On the Run Fiction, Glass Gates Collective, Roi Faineant, Flash Fiction Magazine, Hyacinth Review, and Evening Street Review.

The Bird’s View

Poetry by Tarah Friend Cantore

I perch in my favorite maple tree outside of her home
Grateful to reach my most northern destination from the South.

I peer in through the window.
She is where I left her late autumn.
Writing at her desk
still
I am thankful that hasn’t changed.

What has?
She is wearing glasses. I don’t recall her having them before.
Is her hair more gray or is it just my imagination?
More wrinkles too

Her shoulders are elevated.
Does she recognize the stress within her body?
Should I let her know?
I leave my branch and fly to another nearby
hoping to get her attention.

I do.
She turns to look at me
saying “Hey, Blue! Welcome back!”
She looks back at her journal,
rubs her neck and sensing the tension
instinctively rolls her shoulders
Her chest rises and falls
She’s not coughing anymore. Wonderful.
Three cleansing deep breaths
and another
She likes even numbers.

At the other end of the room
I see more bright paintings
She’s been busy.
One in progress on the easel
Teal fence, blue sky
the Outline of a lighthouse?
Has she traveled recently
or is this a memory from her favorite place
and summer vacations in Maine?

The sun reflects off of her wedding rings.
Thank whatever higher power for that.
She has worked hard on her marriage.
Sparkle

She looks up from the page
out at me again
she wills me to stay
and ask my friends to join
Sunshine and warmth

She looks down
resuming writing
What emotion is she spilling onto the page?
Fiction or nonfiction?
A poem?

Her attention is drawn to the computer screen
She writes a few more lines
concluding with pen down

She looks at her reflection
adjusting her position.
Is her head on straight?
Literally- her posture has been called into question
Figuratively too- her sanity is questionable recently
Is she participating in another virtual writing group?
Does she finally see herself as a writer?

She nods to the other humans,
to me,
to herself.

She believes.


Tarah Friend Cantore has been writing for three years, starting with a non-fiction memoir incorporating her artwork in tough & vulnerable. She wrote and recently published her debut work of fiction, Spiral Bound. Her poetry has been published in the Telling Our Stories Through Word and Image Anthology in 2021 and 2022.

The Phone Call

Fiction by Laura L. Feldman & Stephen M. Feldman

I willed my phone to ring. The literary agent had scheduled the call for 2:00 p.m. Not yet late, still one minute before the hour.

I had dreamed of being a writer since junior high, when I’d written my first story for an honors English class. The A+ didn’t hurt, and neither did my mom’s encouragement.

My novel manuscript had consumed two years of writing and rewriting. Before contacting agents, I devoted a month to crafting a query that pitched the story and my writing background in three flawless paragraphs. I sent it to fifteen agents. Three requested the full manuscript.

A month later I received an email scheduling this phone appointment. Soon I would be talking with an agent who wanted to represent me and sell my novel.

I would be a writer. ‘Yes, I’ve published a novel,’ I would say. No longer a poseur.

I checked the time again.

Two minutes late. It didn’t mean anything. I needed to relax, act as if I spoke to agents all the time.

I glanced at my list of questions, lifted from several books about landing an agent. Prepare for the phone call, they all instructed. Don’t immediately say, ‘Yes, yes, yes! I want you to be my agent.’ Ask questions. What did she like about the manuscript? What were the weaknesses? What changes would she want to see before submitting it to publishers? Did she have a plan for the submission process?

Act like a professional writer.

Three minutes late.

Had I gotten the day wrong? Was the call scheduled for tomorrow rather than today? I opened the agent’s email.

I’d already read the brief message at least a dozen times. But I reread it again, twice: “Can you talk about your ms. this coming Thursday at 2 p.m., ET?”

No mistake. It was today.

The phone buzzed. I checked the screen and my stomach hardened into a knot. This call would change my life.

The phone buzzed again. I took a deep breath and answered.

“Hello,” I squeaked. “Sorry.” I cleared my throat and tried again. “Hello, this is Sara Klein.”

“Hi, Sara,” said a sweet lilting voice.

“Hello,” I said, for the third time.

“Just so you know, I’m not calling to offer representation.”

“What?”

“I want to be clear at the outset. So you’re not disappointed. Or confused.”

The ice cracked and I crashed through. Panicking, I opened my mouth to scream and freezing water rushed in. I was drowning in the darkness. Which way was up, which way was down?

“Some writers,” she said, her voice muffled and distant, “think this first phone call is to offer representation.”

“No,” I croaked. “Of course not.”

I glanced at my list of questions. Nothing there suggested an appropriate response.

“If you’re amenable,” she said, “I’d like to discuss your manuscript and some changes I’d like to see.”

I squeezed my eyes shut, holding in my tears.

“If you rewrite it,” she continued, “I’d be willing to take another look at it.”

“That would be great,” I managed to say.

“No promises of course.”

“That makes sense. You’ll have to read the—”

“I don’t want to mislead you. I plan to read the rewrite, if you do it. But at this stage, I can’t promise I’ll have the time.”

“Oh.” I squeezed my temples. What were we even discussing, then? “I understand.”

“Do you still want to proceed?”

“Please,” I wanted to hang up, throw my manuscript in the trash, and cry for a month. “Go ahead,” I said.

“Wonderful. The first thing I noticed was a problem with the plot.”

“The plot?” Shit. Shit. Shit.

“That’s right. After the first plot point—”

“Hold on,” I said, clicking my ball point pen. “Just one second.” I flipped the page where I’d jotted my useless questions. “Sorry. I’m ready.”

And she was off and running, tearing the manuscript apart. I couldn’t concentrate, couldn’t comprehend enough to ask intelligent questions. I tried to take copious notes, nearly transcribing the conversation. Later on, after I calmed down, I might be able to learn from my notes and benefit from this torturous experience.

If an agent, any agent, was willing to critique my manuscript, I should consider myself lucky—that’s what I reminded myself. Despite my disappointment, I would rewrite and send the manuscript to her again. Of course I could do exactly what she wanted, and she could still reject it. Or I might not even hear back from her. She hadn’t even committed to reading the next version.

As she talked, I decided to send the rewrite to other agents as well. Why not?

The phone call ended abruptly. She had another appointment. Maybe with an actual client? I didn’t ask.

Hollowed, drained of motivation, I riffled through my three pages of notes without comprehending them. My gaze shifted to the desk drawer on the lower right. I didn’t want to do it. But I couldn’t fool myself any longer. Neither this agent nor any other would likely offer representation.

I swallowed, my throat dry and raspy. Then I slid open the drawer and pulled out a stack of law school applications. I’d put it off long enough.


Laura L. Feldman writes and edits for the Wyoming Survey & Analysis Center. She has degrees and certificates from the University of Oregon, Stanford, and Harvard. Stephen M. Feldman is the Housel/Arnold Distinguished Professor of Law at the University of Wyoming. He has published several short stories and nonfiction books.

Rapid Transit

Fiction by E.H. Jacobs

After some consideration, I decided to move from Town X, where I had dwelt for many peaceful, if uneventful, years, to Town Y, a neighboring municipality with which I had only a vague familiarity. I had been feeling for some time that my life had become stale and routine. I had many acquaintances but few, if any, friends, and social conversation always returned to the same topics, like a planet on a fixed orbit: that week’s golf game, the latest baseball trades, and who was meeting up with whom at which expensive restaurant. Nobody seemed interested in discussing, say, the audiobook of Hemingway stories I had been listening to. I heard that the citizens of Y were a livelier lot and that interesting things went on there.

I awoke the first morning in my new home after sleeping so deeply that my memory of the move seemed suspended in a hazy semi-conscious fog. I was surrounded by boxes neatly stacked with no markings to indicate their contents or the room in which each belonged. Perhaps the strangest thing of all: there were no flaps or openings. On top of the highest stacked box was a note that appeared to be in my mother’s handwriting, although my mother had been dead for some years, which simply said: “Don’t open anything you’re not sure of.”

I went outside to see if the newspaper had arrived and a gust of cold wind – quite unexpected in July – hit me in the face, freezing my nose and slamming shut the front door. In my pajamas, I hugged myself tightly to keep warm. The sky darkened and small, white objects began drifting lazily from above, like snowflakes. They soon multiplied and I was in the middle of what appeared to be a squall. As the objects got closer, it became clear that they were not snowflakes, but loose pages from a notebook. I grabbed a handful as they twisted and torqued around me. They were from stories that I had written. A dry, rustling sound, barely audible at first, rose in volume, morphing into laughter. It was the sound of my pages laughing at me. I was hit on the head by what felt like hailstones. After each hit, I saw fall to the ground a book. Each was written by an author whom I had grown to admire: Saroyan, Woolf and Styron. The books flipped themselves open and shook their pages in laughter.

Lying in the driveway was a black high heel shoe with the bottom of the heel roughly shorn off. I looked at my feet, as if the shoe were mine, and I marveled that I could be capable of switching identities so fluidly. Alongside the shoe was a book authored by my favorite workshop leader. The wind blew the book open to a page that read: “Lesson Five: Raise the Stakes.” At that moment, blood started dripping out of the shoe.

I walked into the house in some distress only to hear a knock at the door, commanding and insistent.

Standing with his back to me was a man, broad shouldered, in a gray turtleneck sweater. He turned, holding out two fishing rods and smiling broadly with a self-satisfied, I wouldn’t exactly call it a smirk, but with an expression that definitely showed that he knew who he was and was going to tell me who I was. He had a well-trimmed, salt and pepper beard framing a very familiar face. I opened the door.

I managed to squeak: “Ernest? Is that really you?”

Hemingway let out a hearty laugh. “I’ve come to teach you to fish!” He said a little too loudly, but with good cheer.

“F-fish?” I stammered.

“Well, it was either that or bullfighting, and I didn’t think you’d be up for that.”

“But why’d you–?”

Somebody had to. Come on, you don’t want to end up like those pansies – Saroyan, Woolf and Styron. You’ve got to learn how to fish for yourself!”

I hesitated, not knowing if I should accept his invitation or invite him in for tea. After all, how often does one get to spend time with Ernest Hemingway?

Hemingway looked past me into the house.

“What’s with those boxes?” he asked.

“I don’t know how to open them.”

Hemingway pushed past me. “What’s in them?” he asked, as he leaned his fishing rods against the tallest stack.

“Secrets?” I said uncertainly.

“What kind of secrets, man!”

I shrugged. “Don’t know.”

Hemingway took out a fishing knife. “Well, let’s find out then. There are stories in there! Let’s get to work.”

Before he could start cutting the boxes, I blubbered: “But my mother—”

“Your mother? Do you always listen to your mother? I’m sure she was a lovely woman, but still, you know – fish for yourself!”

I nodded and, with shaking hands, pulled down the first box.


E.H. Jacobs is a psychologist and writer in Massachusetts. His work has appeared in Coneflower Café, Santa Fe Literary Review, Permafrost Magazine, Hawaii Pacific Review, Storgy Magazine, Streetlight Magazine, Aji Magazine, and Smoky Quartz. He has published two books on parenting and book reviews in the American Journal of Psychotherapy.

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